Dark Isle Blitz: Gosebusters

There I was finishing up my garnish tray in the Dark Isles Daquiri Den. Our annual bash just keeps getting bigger and so does the guest list. I let the wolfman in early to enjoy a beer while my gremlin barback washed and set glasses. I could scarely believe it when a dimensional portal opened and out stepped Gozer the Gozerian. The Traveler that had nearly destroyed New York.
“Are you a God?”, She hissed
“I am”, I said calmly as I sipped my coffee. Luckily the Ghostbusters were in my Rolodex.
She seemed in disbelief. So I quickly set about cobbling together a cocktail to prove my claims. A wash of relief ran over me when her mind seemed blown. This year was going to be a veritable Ballroom Blitz here on the Dark Isles.

GozerGulp (7)
Ghostbusters is one of those movies that you either love, or you have no pulse. I’ll be honest however I’ve always been a huge fan of The Real Ghostbusters. This cherished cartoon builds off the 1st movie and sets the guys against everyone from devils, and valkyrie’s to Dracula and Cthulhu himself. The risks taken and references made in this cartoon are as delightful as the the jokes still are to me. It’s something I watch every October because of all it’s horror callbacks. This drink specifically was born our of us buying Westbrook’s Gose cans without really knowing anything aside from we really loved their other beers. We’d never had a sour, salty, coriander beer before and it was a shock. However I’ll never forget my elation when we read how to pronounce it on the back of the can. It sounded almost exactly like Gozer. We knew then we had to turn this fine funky beer into a cocktail.

GozerGulp (3)
Gozer’s Gulp
1 oz Flor de Cana 7
1 oz Brugal white
¾ oz fresh lime juice
½ oz sweetened coconut cream
½ oz orange curacao
dash Bittermen’s Elemakule bitters
3 oz Westbrook Gose (or other salty, sour,Gose style beer)

Shake all ingredients except the beer well with ice then top inside the shaker with beer, pour into a pilsner glass and garnish with mint or ghoulish decorations.

This drink’s flavor is utterly fascinating. It’s PKE readings are off the charts! It’s coconut delights quickly melt away into slight twinges of coriander and salt. The rum really cuts into the dominance of the Gose and forms an ecto-containment unit around it. The dry flavors of brugal and flor de cana really make this drink along with the Gose. The orange curacao and sour beer play very nicely in the finish especially as you move to the middle of the glass,. Like any good Tiki drink this one’s flavor changes pleasingly as you enjoy it. If you find the Gose to be a bit strong take it down a half ounce. We found this variation very pleasing as well. We hope you’ll tell us which you like best in the comments.
GozerGulp (8)

The doors are open and the guests are making their way in. This years ghoulish celebration is promising to be bigger than ever. I’ll have to put the call out for some help. Until next time…

“You Get Hammered America!” -JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I Survived the Cowgirl Uprising

Frozen drinks, aren’t they fun? I mean the cleanup is the pits and the prep can be a nightmare. Even so I still love a blender drink now and again. So I bring you another little challenge drink this month from my dear friend Dagreb from Nihil Utopia. Probably the best Tiki drink made in a true blender and not a milkshake blender is the Missionary’s downfall. This leads us to Dagreb’s challenge…

COBRznzUYAA79txSo being from the South I know plenty of Cowgirls. By Cowgirls I mean drunken suburbian girls in western hats after a George Strait concert. I associate these sauced southern belles with peaches, and I got the idea to play with the Missionary’s Downfall in that regard. The Missionary’s Downfall does have peach brandy, so why not swap out the fresh pineapple with fresh peaches? A Cowgirl may not like rum, but she would surely be tempted by overproof bourbon. From their we add a few Tiki touches and try to follow Donn’s pattern. The end result I find to be pretty darn tasty. Although, I did tweak the name, it just flows better.


Nothing says tasty like my old boot.

Cowgirl Uprising
1 ½ oz Wild Turkey 101
½ oz Orange Curacao
1 oz honey syrup (1:1)
½ oz fresh lime juice
¼ cup of diced peaches (About 10 medium large diced chunks)
1 tsp absinthe
Dash orange bitters
¾ cup crushed ice

Combine ingredients into a blender and blend on high for 20 seconds. Pour into a small goblet and garnish with mint.


The peaches come through beautifully and pair nicely with the absinthe and whiskey. The honey and lime provide a heavenly balance and body to add to the orange peel twang. The mint is a pretty important garnish here, not only to tie in with the Missionary’s Downfall but also to marry with the peaches in a lovely aroma. This drink is definitely on a different path than our Missionary, but lets just say they went to the same Sunday School.


I hope Dagreb likes the results. I know we do over here. I was hoping to do a few more challenge drinks this month, but illness and October prep got in the way. In any case we hope you’ve enjoyed this spin in our magic blender. Until next time…


“You get Hammered America!” -JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

MxMo OJ: Tropi-cure what ails Me

Well it’s MxMo time again and this one barely got done. Blame it on being a bit under the weather, but luckily DJ Hawaiian Shirt from Spirited Remix has me drinking my Orange Juice for this MxMo. I guess there are some detractors to orange juice in the cocktail world. I don’t run into them in my circles, however I seem to have read some suspender snapping ponces railing against the tasty juice. You may not see OJ a lot in classic cocktails, but it’s common in Tiki. Hey finally an easy one!

remixmo_final1Alright so before I got sick this drink was mostly done, unfortunately booze and a stomach flu don’t mix well. I have to say I really adore oranges. I have the fondest memories of Sunkist orange soda and cheesy 50’s scifi on cable as a kid. Heck even when there is an option of candy I tend to go for the orange flavor. The juice itself is healthy, colorful, and smells great. The peel is packed with flavor as well, but it’s not really our focus here. I wanted to add some spices, but really let that fresh flavor show through. I think the funk of the Barbancourt is really cool in this drink and several variations on it I made. Enough blathering though, here’s one to your health.

Tropicure (1)
1 oz El Dorado 12 year
1 oz Barbancourt White
1 oz fresh orange juice (Gotta be fresh on this one)
½ oz fresh lime juice
½ oz simple syrup
¼ oz Allspice Dram
tsp Benedictine
dash Bittermen’s orange cream citrate

Shake ingredients together and pour into a hurricane glass unstrained. Garnish with an orange wheel and straw.

The Benedictine and allspice provide a nice contrasting nose to the orange peel. There’s a warmth to this drink. Not the burn of alcohol, but the soft greeting of mellow spices and the lightly tangy refreshment of the fresh orange juice. The rums provide lots of depth in the background with funk and rich smokey molasses. White Agricole and aged Demerara are actually a decent pair. This will cure your rainy day blues, but not your stomach flu. Sometimes I get decent results from quality bottled orange juice. Especially when it’s a minor element. This is not one of those times, you gotta get to juicing.

Well this was a really fun MxMo theme. I even made an orange peel syrup I didn’t get to use. Rest assured you’ll get to see that soon. Thanks again to our host and until next time…

“You get Hammered America!” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Filling Lono’s Cup

Fall is here and it brings with it great weather, awesome movies, and pumpkin spice products. I’m not immune to a certain chain’s pumpkin spice coffee. I’m also not immune to a good drink-making dare. So I put the word out to my twitter peeps to give me some drinks to work on while I get ready for our annual Halloween Blowout. This article my awesome friend Muse gets a cheers for our first little idea.

ChallengeSo I’ve used coconut a lot on this site. It comes with the Tiki Territory. Coconut cream is sweet and I often use it instead of a syrup. I also introduce a lot of my spice elements with a syrup. My bro Dan and I have been discussing finally doing a pumpkin spice syrup for the site so I decided the time was now. I hope Muse doesn’t mind that I used no Coco Lopez here, instead we use creamy delicious coconut milk to add delicious flavor and mouth feel. I also used the new syrup to add an array of pie spice to make your taste-buds glad it’s fall. Dark rum and orange peel love coconut and pumpkin alike, when you bring them together we have a happy family. Also let me make this clear. This is a pumpkin spice syrup, not a pumpkin pie syrup. So of course there’s no pumpkin in it. Pumpkin spice is a flavorful fall spice mix added to baked goods. I find it hilarious people were surprised Starbucks wasn’t putting squash in coffee. We’ve made a couple of drinks with pumpkin puree. This isn’t one of them.

Lono's Cup (3)

Lono Cup
1 oz Dark Jamaican Rum (Coruba)
1 oz Gold Virgin Islands Rum (Cruzan)
1 oz Orange Curacao (Ferrand)
¾ oz fresh lime juice
½ oz unsweetened coconut milk
¾ oz pumpkin spice syrup (see below)
1 hearty dash Angostura orange

Shake well with ice and garnish with peels of lime and orange. Add dashes of powdered spice and a lime wheel as desired.

Pumpkin Spice Syrup
4 sicks of cinnamon, crushed
1 heaping tablespoon of allspice, crushed
1 heaping teaspoon cloves, crushed
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 grated bulb of nutmeg
1 cup sugar
1 cup water

Combine ingredient and bring to a small boil while stirring often, then reduce heat and keep stirring for two minutes. Let infuse off heat for at least four hours but no more than eight before straining and bottling.

The coconut milk, orange peel, and nutmeg in the syrup really give this one a great nose. If you wanna enhance the spice aspect you could dash the top with a little Pumpkin Spice, but I think this is perfect. The orange liqueur and bitters add a really great refreshing note to this that would be sorely missed. The pumpkin spice and coconut milk are such a match made in heaven and both marry well with the dark Jamaican rum. The gold rum helps keep things light here. I tried Mount Gay and Appleton Special as well. Both rums were good, but I liked how Cruzan moved to the background more than the others.

Lono's Cup (2)So I hope Muse and all of you like this drink. I find it to be pretty damn delicious myself. Make your voice heard in the comments below and hit me up on Twitter. Until next time…

“You Get Hammered America”– JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

All L.I.T. Up: Matcha, Matcha, Man

The Long Island is a very simple drink. That’s the reason it’s on so many menus in chain restaurants. It’s easy to make small modifications to make the drink unique. Also by touting a premium brand in their formula they can better advertise to customers. One thing has always bothered me, besides the ultra lousy well brands used to make them. There’s no damn tea in the drink, it’s colored with coke. I’ve always wanted to put the tea back in the L.I.T. Good thing I have a blog because I intend to do just that.

GreenBlade (1)
We’ve used tea before on the site, though unfortunately in the past it has tended to be a background player. The Haggerty’s Draught uses a syrup to add an herbal backing to other big flavors. However thanks to a Kurosawa marathon I stumbled across a great idea, matcha, a powdered Japanese green tea. It’s very strong, herbal, and quite trendy right now. Thanks to Japanese animation, samurai movies, and literature the tea ceremony isn’t so foreign to many nerds like me. So I decided to give it a try, and man does it add bold flavor to cocktails. However it’s color and high price make potent problems to deal with. On the bright side you can make it and keep it chilled in the fridge for a few days without much issue. The flavor does improve with some sweetness, but if you enjoy a rich herbal flavor you’ll likely enjoy it. I can see pairing it easily with gin, or using it in a bigger better syrup. In any case I’m certain you’ve never had a L.I.T like this. It’s delicious, bright, and strong potion for spring or summer with a herbaceous, and sour flavor.

GreenBlade (2)
Green Blade Tea
¾ oz Flor de Cana 4 white
¾ oz vodka
¾ oz Camus VS Cognac
¾ oz Bacardi Ron de Solera
¾ oz fresh lime juice
½ oz Clement Creole Shrubb
½ oz simple syrup
½ oz matcha tea (1 tsp powder to 1 oz hot water, make as instructed otherwise on package)
dash Angostura orange bitters

In a shaker tin combine ingredients and shake very well to combine. Pour into a footed pilsner and garnish with orange peel and pineapple leaves.

The aroma here is funky fresh, to date myself mightily. The orange peel and creole shrubb brighten the nose considerably while the matcha and white rum belt out some strong vegetal and herbal notes. The cognac and rum combo make a strong entrance and greet your palate with crisp orange notes. The lime and matcha slowly waft in after, with the matcha finishing strong but not in a way that overpowers. There’s a lot of room to play here. I spent three weeks swapping rums, syrups, and bitters around. Needless to say your gonna see a couple more matcha pieces from me this year. In the end I chose this one because it puts a high end spend on the L.I.T. While keeping some of those fresh, crisp, boozy notes a well made L.I.T can bring.

I hope we’ve shown this month that if made well you can redeem a Long Island. More than anything I believe that the framework is strong, you just need to spruce up the floor plan. In the end a Long Island teaches you one crucial Tiki skill, blending spirits. Construct a blend poorly and they won’t sing, they’ll riot. I’ve had to gas a few bad blends this month, but in the end I got some gold. What was your favorite iteration? What are your thoughts on the infamous L.I.T? Can this fun college skull crusher be redeemed? Until next time…

“You get Hammered America” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

MxMo 100: All L.I.T. Up and the Fog Cutter

Wow folks it’s MxMo 100, that’s something pretty damn special right there. I want to first and foremost give mad respect to Paul Clarke and Fred Yarm. This wouldn’t have been achieved without them. So check out their blogs Cocktail Chronicles and Cocktail Virgin/Slut, and show them some love. The theme for this MxMo might be the most difficult ever, Cocktail Chronicles. As I understood it this was supposed to be a drink that transcended time. Now I love me, I’m a prideful guy. I do not feel comfortable however calling any of my personal creations timeless. Flat out that is not for me, or any one person to decide. The people and the march of time shows what drinks live on in the glasses of the public, and what fades away like the Macarena.

mxmo_c_logo250So this month I’m not going to bring you a Rated R Original. That’s not because I don’t have faith in my potions. I’d be proud to serve them to Vic and Donn themselves for their approval. I however want to fit the theme as best I can, and stay within this month’s theme on Rated R Cocktails. As I have said before this month the Long Island Iced Tea looks sort of like it descended from a Tiki drink. If it did it may very well be the long lost, drug addled, grandchild of the Fog Cutter. The Fog Cutter is a very strong drink, made up of several different liquors and lemon. Sounding familiar? Vic accents this with his trademark orgeat and provides a lovely float of cream sherry to provide a tempting nose and cut the sourness. Like the L.I.T it’s very customizeable. By simply swapping a liquor and a float you can call this drink your original very easily. Which contemporary restaurants did. Unlike Donn, Vic did not care much about keeping his recipes a secret. On the contrary he put out recipe books and later mixes to encourage you to make them yourself. While some claim the L.I.T to be invented in the 20’s that sort of sounds like bullshit to me. The drink was mentioned in the 60’s but never really started being seen until the mid to late 70’s. This being the case it’s not hard for me to believe it’s some bartender’s take on a Fog Cutter. Even if the two were never related, they damn sure have a family resemblance.

FogCutter (1)
Vic had great success with the Fog Cutter, it became his third best seller. Even he recognized how potent it was eventually toning it down in the 50’s. The Samoan Fog Cutter is regarded by many as the better of the two. Well guess what sunshine your not getting it here. We’re going to give you the brain cell blowing original recipe. Mostly because we hate our livers. If you want the Samoan and more Fog Cutter history grab a copy of Beachbum Remixed, or Jeff’s Total Tiki app on Iphone. Long Live the Bum! No he doesn’t pay me, but he does put up with my drunk ass when I visit Latitude 29. That’s all I ask of a mentor.

FogCutter (3)
Fog Cutter
As Presented in Beachbum Remixed
2 oz fresh lemon juice
1 oz fresh orange juice
½ oz orgeat
2 oz Cruzan White
1 oz brandy
½ oz gin
½ oz cream sherry

Place all ingredients except sherry in a shaker with ice and shake very well. Pour into a large glass or Fog Cutter mug and garnish with a Trader Vic pick and mint. In this case we used some Rose of Sharon blossoms.

The aroma is helped out a lot by the sherry float. If absent it really only smells like lemon with a faint waft of juniper. Having a nice float in a Fog Cutter is kinda essential as the sherry really cuts the strong lemon sourness. I enjoy a sour sip but this is on the far side of things. The lemon is kind of a bully in the drink. Still other flavors do find minuscule purchase. Orange and orgeat come through as does the gin and brandy on the finish. The sherry and lemon are very up front as one would kind of expect. I do not find it a stretch at all to call this the Long Island Iced Tea’s Grandpappy, especially since it’s brother is the Scorpion Bowl. Foot note this drink actually gets a bit better once it dilutes. No wonder Vic used crushed ice and a longer blend time in the Samoan.

The Fog Cutter has really been my inspiration through L.I.T Month here on RRC. For a few ideas on how I would twist up this venerable Tiki sip click here and here. Also stay tuned this week for one of the funkier drinks I’ve ever made. I’m so proud to be a part of MxMo 100, I love this community. I hope we can toast 100 more someday. Until next time…

“You get Hammered America” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

All L.I.T. Up: Riding Waves

I think the first Long Island Iced Tea that I ever had was at some TGI Applefarts type place with dusty crap on the walls and taxidermy paying you more attention than the wait staff. I was about 19, but most of my friends were 25 and all drinking so the waitress didn’t card me. It was blue and looking back it was probably mostly pineapple juice. The menu had about 5 of them in a variety of colors and flavors. It was a very educational experience from what little I can remember of it. I remember a couple of older ladies looking at our drunken revelry and heard one say “Oh aren’t those boys having fun.”

Waverider (2)
Long Islands are about having low brow fun. So are blue drinks, so it’s no surprise you see chain restaurants turn these devils blue with regularity. They draw the eye immediately because well, that’s not a normal color for a drink no matter how many I make. Tiki abounds with similar gimmicks, making me think that Long Island’s must be a descendant of Polynesian Pop. It’s hard to make a drink that’s both bright blue and deeply flavorful. To preserve that color you have to use mostly clear spirits and lighter colored mixers. These items are usually known for having bright and light flavors, but they need darker richer flavors for balance. I try to add dashes of dark or gold liquors when I can, but you have to be careful not to turn it green. Onto the booze!

Waverider (4)
Waverider Iced Tea
¾ oz El Dorado 3 year
¾ oz Purus Vodka
¾ oz Beefeater Gin
¾ oz Mount Gay Rum
¾ oz fresh lime juice
½ oz blue curacao
½ oz honey syrup
1 oz ginger beer
dash of Bittermen’s Hopped Grapefruit Bitters

Shake all ingredients except ginger beer well with ice. Add ginger beer and then pour unstrained into a chimney glass. Garnish with a few springs of fresh mint and a swizzle.

The mint, bitters, and gin do a lot of the nose work here. This drink is on the lighter side with a touch of sweetness. The lime and bitters are good match for the ginger. The gin really impacts the more mellow flavors. El Dorado 3 year adds a lot of body, if I had to sub it I’d probably use Old New Orleans white. I’d rather not sub it though, El Dorado three just works so well. This drink has a twangy, fresh, taste with a light wiggle at the end. Ginger and honey is a pretty great combination and the Gin helps the kids out nicely. The Waverider is pretty customize-able in the syrup category. For awhile I was making these with Vanilla syrup and I thought that was the right track. But I subbed honey on a whim and that worked very nice as well. Honey let the other flavors come out a bit better. You can use a double strength honey mix if the boozy flavors come in to strong. I tried it both ways and went with the single, but by all means use what works for you here. If you don’t have the bitters I encourage the purchase, they accent a planters punch nicely as well as a rye old fashioned. If you have to sub use something with some bite like allspice or nutmeg based bitters. I used a ginger beer from the mixer section because it was on sale, it was a little weaker and clearer than the stuff I normally favor. However I think the drink could benefit from the use of Reed’s or Buffalo Rock.

Waverider (6)

Fun means blue, and L.I.T’s are supposed to be fun. One thing is for sure it tastes way better than any chain drink. Well they are fun for everyone but your liver anyway. Next time I plan to put the Tea in the L.I.T. We’ll see if that scheme works out. Until next time…

“You get Hammered America” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

All L.I.T. Up: Lost Island Iced Coffee

Sometimes you get in a rut and need a break. We’re coming up on having done 5 years of Rated R Cocktails. So I guess you can call the past month of silence a vacation of sorts. It’s the longest break we’ve taken from publicly pontificating on drinking and Tiki in 5 years. I’ve actually penned and nearly posted a few articles during the impromptu break, but none of them felt perfect or fun. Even the best take breaks, but it’s time to saddle back up.

Lost IslandIceCoffee (1)

Recently my best bud and frequent idea contributor Dan messaged me with the notion of Tikifying the Long Island Ice Tea. I liked the idea for a lot of reasons, mostly because the nose in the air crowd have made this drink the icon of their disgust. I myself am just the kind of guy who enjoys offending the easily offended. I’ll be honest the variation and measurements remind me of a Trader Vic and Stephen Crane Frankenstien monster. The elite would forever banish the L.I.T from menu’s, but they never will. It’s simple, popular, and if made right really not bad. The real reason it’s so successful is that it has a perfect skeleton to customize. This is why every chain restaurant has their own version, our college favorite being the L.I.T. Bonanza that is Logan’s Roadhouse. They may not be excellent examples of craft mixology, but they could be if anyone took the time or effort. So we present for your jeers and entertainment a series of my efforts to improve the maligned Long Island Ice Tea.

Lost IslandIceCoffee (2)

To begin I go to the well. Coffee is one of my very favorite drink additions. While thinking on a way to turn our theme drink on it’s head I decided Iced Coffee would be a fun flip on “Iced Tea”. Now there’s no tea in a classic L.I.T., but the play on words made me laugh. I had recently seen a Polynesian coffee drink using coconut milk and ginger. I decided to bring one of my favorite pairings back for a bow. The combinations are rather inspired, finding liquor blends that don’t break up the marriage is the hardest part. Well enough gabbing, lets get down to brass tax.

Lost IslandIceCoffee (3)

Lost Island Ice Coffee
¾ oz Barbancourt 5 Star
¾ oz Appleton 12 year
¾ oz Camus VS Cognac
¾ oz wheat vodka (Or any vodka hell I won’t tell. But I got a giant bottle of Purus for free recently.)
¾ oz fresh lime juice
¾ oz dark roast drip coffee
½ oz coconut cream (Lopes or Coco Real)
dash of Bittermen’s Elemakule bitters

Shake ingredients together with ice and pour into a pilsner. Garnish with flowers, lime, or parasol. Serve with a straw

Sweet notes of orange, cinnamon, coffee, creamy coconut candy, and something faintly apricotish. The drink has a nice thick body and it does immediately draw thoughts of drive through ice coffee. The coffee beats back the coconut overtones slightly, but not so much they both don’t meet you arm and arm at the front. It dries out after that into rich rummy tones supported by the light round bite of cognac. I’m sure vodka is doing it’s job somewhere. The bitters really are crucial here for depth. So even if you don’t have Elemakule (Shame on you!) you should still add a hearty splash of Angostura.

So what do you think? Have I tempted you into giving this old rascal another try? No? Well hold on to your butt Aunt Matilda cause we’re only getting started. It’s nice to be back in the saddle, we hope your glad to see us. Until next time…

“You get Hammered America!” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Stocking the Tiki Bar: Glassware

So now thanks to our first two parts you can make your Tiki drink, but what will you put it in? The answer may not be as easy as you if your goal is to serve a professional looking drink to your guests. I’ll tell you flat out this step is the hardest for a home bartender. You can travel or order online for hard to find spirits, but proper glassware isn’t always easy to find. When you go shopping for glassware at your local store you will find an array of options. Take retail glassware home and make your drink however and you’ll find it doesn’t come close to filling it. Retail glassware is ridiculously large often 8 to 9 ounces for stemware and up to 24 ounces for tall glasses. Proper bars that make craft cocktails often use glasses less than half those sizes, and good luck finding them at Target. So to continue our series we’ll tell you the most common kinds of glassware for common Tiki, proper sizes, and where to buy them.

Coupes and Globes

Ah the coupe, elegant and delicate, yet far more durable than a martini glass. This type of glass is common with classic cocktails and tiki as well. We use a 4.5 oz glass from Libbey that we bought from a local craft cocktail bar. A coupe bigger than this would be a pain in the ass as most daiquiris that fill them are right about 4 ounces. They have served us well and after 2 years we still haven’t cracked any of the original six we bought. Asking your local watering hole if you can buy some of their glasses is probably the best tip we can give for hard to find barware. Coupes especially are pretty ubiquitous in craft cocktail places, and most places will sell you a few even if they don’t advertise it. The globe glasses I use Hula Ghoul (5)have been in the family since my parents got married, but they are essentially small 8 oz wine glasses. If I had to re-buy these I’d probably hit a restaurant supply website and match them based on shape an ounce. For purposes of research the closest appear to be Libbey Embassy #3769. These are a little smaller, but that’s not a bad thing. These sweet spot for these glasses is between 6 and 8 ounces. Buying wholesale is not as bad as you might think. You do have to get a case of 24 usually, but most cases I’ve bought are only 55 to 80 dollars. Chances are you don’t need 24 glasses, but you can always split a case with a like-minded pal or two. They can also make great wedding gifts. Worse comes to worse you don’t have to worry as much about them breaking. Coupes and globes are used for up drinks, usually daiquiri variations. For shaken drinks I use the coupes. For blended drinks like the Derby Daiquiri I turn to globes. Don’t buy martini glasses. With how fragile they are your better off just mailing me the money instead.

Double Old Fashioned

The workhorse of any bar. These glasses can hold anything from a refined spirit with large chunk iNiuNaut (2)ce to a beautiful Mai Tai. These will probably be the first glasses most home bartenders buy, because they are easy to get retail. I have found most big box stores have double old fashioned glasses that fit the bill. Most of the time these glasses are 8 to 12 ounces, any bigger than that is not ideal. For me the sweet spot is right at 10 ounces. Try to find a model that’s easy to stack so you can save space for other toys.

Tiki Bowls

Emphasis on the Bowl. These specialty ceramics are used for communal drinks like drinkware (1)Scorpion Bowls, Rum Kegs, and Volcano Bowls. Like a lot of Tiki ceramics you will find they are pricey and often oversized. Special care should be taken they don’t get chipped or broken, so never use a dishwasher. What I am saying is they are pretty, but sometimes a pain in the ass. However these are pretty classic. I believe they hit prominence in Tiki bars before the actual mugs really did though I could be wrong. Oversized snifters, jumbo beer glasses, or larger than average hurricane glasses can work as a substitute. The optimal size for these is from 18 to 36 ounces. It’s good to have a few different options as some communal drinks are bigger than others.

Specialty Stemware

So here is where things can get really funky and rare. There are scores of “other” stemware that appears on old menu’s. The Molokai Mike glass is something I have coveted but often eludes me. It can be called thistle or celebration, but always seems a little off from the old TreeViper (3)pictures I find. In this category I rely on three types of glass. The first are super sexy footed pilsner glasses (Libbey #6425). These 10 ounce beauties are perfect for those odd drinks in-between a punch and a daiquiri, where a coupe is to small and a chimney to big. The Port au Prince, Dr. Funk, and Port Light immediately come to mind as candidates. Yes these are wholesale, but they are eye catching and worth the effort. Second are tulip glasses as seen in our Tree Viper and assorted classics as above. These are easier to find in specialty retailers like World Market or can be bought from your local craft beer place. These run a bit bigger at about 12 to 13 ounces, but they look great holding a colorful drink. Finally we have a Hurricane glass for those big drinks that are just shy of being communal drinks. Named for their most common occupant we typically look for items between 14 and 16 ounces. It’s also worth mentioning that cocktail kingdom recently released Pearl Diver and Metal Swizzle cups with the Jeff Berry seal of approval. These are definitely worth checking out.

Tall “Chimney” Glasses

Yes you’ve sTepesPunch (4)een these quite a lot on my site. I love these tall glasses to hold all manner of spins on the Planters Punch. They fit a hand nicely, they frost well when a cold punch is poured in, and they just look great with a nice frothy well shaken head. These glasses tend to be tall and slender, thus the name chimney. Ours actually came from World Market and sit at a nice 13 ounces. Any model between 10 and 13.5 would be perfectly fine. I’ve sometimes considered my life would be a bit easier if my glass held an ounce less.


You may notice we didn’t mention Tiki mugs. Well if you look around the site you’ll also probably notice a distinct lack of them. We’ll explain more in our next piece which will surely ruffle some feathers among dear friends in the Tiki community. If you haven’t yet check out the previous pieces in this series. Also don’t forget your syrup recipes and books. Until next time…


“You get Hammered America” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

MxMo XCVII: My Chinatown Moll

Well if it ain’t MxMo time again! Spring always seems to pull me away from RRC. Well the trend of stirred cocktails continues, but I refuse to let it get me down. After all the amazing staff at The Collins Bar as helped me work on my stir when we do Tiki Nights. The fantastic Fred Yarm of Cocktail Virgin/Slut has made Manhattan’s the theme this month. Since you need fresh citrus to make a Tiki drink we won’t be doing that here. Instead I’m going to flex muscles I normally don’t use and go top hat and tails.mxmologoI love Fred, but I definitely don’t love Manhattans. I’ve tried a lot and I continue to expose myself to them. I’ve had a few that were okay, but they’re all usually to sweet for me. I think I’m just not a vermouth and bourbon guy. I do however love Rob Roy’s which is nothing more than a Scotch Manhattan. So I chose to wander off in that direction. Laphroaig is one of my favorite scotch’s, and the decision to pair it with a dry, fruity Merlot was an easy one to make. A sweeter curacao is essential for brightness here and balance. After that dashes of bitters give the whole thing added depth and roundness. Casual drinkers beware, this drink has some smokey smack to it that I just adore.

Chinatown (3)

“On rainy nights at the Daiquiri Den an old sad sack of a detective shuffles his way in. No rum delights will please this gravel throated grump. The snoop always orders the same thing, something his gal would drink back in the good old days running down leads in old Chinatown. Between puffs of his cigar as he stares in the glass you’d think he could almost still see his long lost lass.”

My Chinatown Moll
1 oz Laphroaig
2 oz Lees Fitch Merlot
½ oz Pierre Ferrand orange curacao
1 dash Bittermen’s Burlesque bitters
1 dash Scrappy’s chocolate bitters

Combine ingredients and stir together with ice. Pour into a chilled coupe and garnish with flower petals and/or a cherry.


This drink would really be perfect in the autumn or winter on a cool, rainy day. The Merlot comes through well in the nose and first sip with a big waft of smoke behind it. The smoke and orange marry really well with one another as the smoke fades into sweet orange and berry. It has a dry austere sort of nature that’s bolstered by the faint hints of chocolate, peppercorn, and hibiscus. Bookmark this one for mid fall and make it again. You’ll get my mental picture I think.

Chinatown (5)Hey it may not be Tiki, but I like it. Plus back in the day they stirred up Martinis and the like along side the potent potions. It’s a good skill to have, and it’s always fun to be part of MxMo. I wanna thank Fred for being pretty damn awesome in general. Until next time…


“You get Hammered America” – JFL

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments